Le Roi de France

The following story is absolutely, positively, one hundred percent, possibly true. You be the judge.

In 2020, construction workers were working in the lower level basements of the Louvre Museum. They had been expanding parts of storage and accidentally knocked down part of a small inner wall. The workers, terrified of what they had done, reported the incident to their supervisor immediately. The supervisor went down to investigate the damage. The wall that was damaged was part of the original construction of the Louvre 12th century fortress. The supervisor brought a few flashlights with her and the crew began inspecting the wall closely. Every bit of debris that had fallen was closely monitored, but not disturbed. Finally the supervisor took the flashlight to peer inside the opening and was shocked by a devilishly handsome face staring back at her. She gasped and staggered back a few paces. the workers around her all retreated with fear that they had damaged the foundation. She pointed with a wavering hand at the opening in the wall and asked them to take a look. The workers lifted their flashlights timid but curious at what they would discover. As all beams of the artificial lights were raised one by one they stopped dead in their track on the same spot.

Their was a portrait inside the wall of a young man dressed as royalty. That young man had never been seen before in any artwork or royal reference, but there he stood so elegantly and commanding. This was indeed a king of France. Over the next few months historians and detectives began scouring every inch of data they could to identify who this unknown king is. The exhaustive search yielded no results, so finally the image was released in to the public asking for anyone’s help who could bring this forgotten king to light. The lineage for the ruler of France had been broken and remade many times since the beginning, but this figure was completely unknown. The painting itself was a mystery as there was no mark of the artist to be found. It did look similar to a work by Francois Gerard, but it was dated to be much too old to be painted in the 18th or 19th century. This painting that could not be explained was discussed around the world, however the year 2020 was a most horrible year so artwork was the least of most people’s worries. Eventually a person had identified who the king was…well who the king resembled anyway.

Two young men who lived in Paris met with the authorities on the situation and told them that the portrait of the unnamed king strikes a remarkable similarity to their American friend. The authorities about to throw these two men out produced a photo on their smart phones showing the american man. They were stunned. The young man in the phone looked exactly like the king. The two Parisians then started flipping through the other photos on their phone to show this was no prank. The young American’s name is Kevin Nicholas Gavit (me) and he was in Texas visiting his family. Kevin was asked to provide a DNA sample along with a few official documents proving he is who he is. A month goes by and Kevin is flown to Paris to meet with the historical society, prominent figures of the art community and most importantly the President of France.

Kevin’s surname “Gavit” was originally “Gavey” when his ancestors lived in France. The interesting thing to know about this, is that Gavey is derived from the female name Genevieve. This is special because surnames are derived from the males, not females. Kevin was brought in to a large room with a giant table in the middle, with enough seats for 50 people. Kevin was told to have a seat while the others were brought in. the table filled up quickly as men and women each more prominent looking than the one before took a seat. Finally the table was full, except for the one seat directly opposite of where Kevin was sitting. A door in the back of the room opened without a sound, but two men dressed in suits, resembling body guards walked in followed by the President of France, Emmanuel Macron. The entirety of the table stood up instantly, Kevin still in shock was a bit delayed, but burst upright to not show disrespect. The President smiling walked directly over to Kevin and shook his hand and patted his shoulder. There were no cameras or reporters in this room, so the act seemed to be genuine. President Macron spoke to Kevin in English, welcoming him. He then said that he is very excited about this meeting and hopes that Kevin was just as excited. Kevin was a bit perplexed because he had no idea why he was meeting with the President of France. He assumed that somehow he might have been related to the person in the portrait, but had not been given any additional information since he was first contacted requesting the DNA sample.

The meeting went on explaining that back in the late 400’s Clovis I the first King of France had an affair with a woman who was not his wife. The woman had given birth to a healthy baby boy. The woman wanted the baby to be baptized, but as she and Clovis were unmarried, could not convince him to allow it. Clovis was born a pagan and intended to die as one. The woman was a dedicated christian, and a nun no less. Clovis soon married his second wife Clotilde. Once she gave birth to a male heir, she instructed Clovis to get rid of his unnatural son. Clovis had a difficult time deciding what he should do, so he reached out to the nun and to his wife where all three decided what could be done. The nun had no interest in raising the child as she felt her life’s work was too much to sustain as a mother. Clotilde wanted the child as far away as possible so that he would not know who he was and would not raise up to battle his brother for power. It was agreed that the baby would be taken to a small farming family in the Jersey islands. He had no name, but was given a surname of Gavey by the King. All of this kept Kevin in awe while he listened hoping for more. It was revealed that the nun was indeed Sainte Genevive. The portrait was later drawn by Genevieve when she was close to death. At that point it was just a sketch, but throughout the years it was added to by at least two separate artists. The painting was later discovered in the 12th century, the person in possession of it was put to death for creating a fake king. The portrait itself was going to be burned, but the then king could not bring himself to do it, so he instead hid it in the small foundation walls of the Louvre. “WOW!” was all Kevin could think while sitting there hearing this fascinating history about his ancestors.

The President went on to tell Kevin that France could use his help. The president described the current issues that faced the country and the world as a whole. For the government to work more efficiently they need someone specific to take on the tasks that are better suited for a monarch. They then proposed to Kevin that he be instated as the King of France to handle all the social activities while the government focused on creating a better France for all. Kevin accepted to moved into the Chateau de Versailles and live on a modest budget while attending all events and making the people of France happy. While there, an immortal drug was discovered and King Kevin lived forever as the happiest King ever.

Yes, quarantine might be getting me.